Tidak ada tamu. Tidak bisa ada tamu.
Rumah ini tidak ada, tidak pernah selesai dibangun. Dinding berdiri tanpa atap, membiarkan dirinya diselimuti lumut dari air mata langit yang tak segan singgah semaunya. Tak peduli berapa lama matahari datang menghangatkan, rumah ini selalu mengutuk dinginnya malam. Menyalahkan rumput liar yang tumbuh terlalu tinggi yang sering kali bising ketika dibelai angin. -Wita Koto
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''Kau itu aku Kita satu jiwa yang berada dalam dua tubuh Kita adalah jiwa-jiwa yang suka membantu, walaupun hanya mendengarkan Semua akan baik-baik saja sayang, percaya bahwa hanya cinta yang dapat sembuhkan luka.'' Kapal besar ini membawa cinta.
Pergi dengan luka yg masih ada, tapi tidak pergi dengan dendam. Kembali ketika nyali telah menjadi bara api yang tak pernah padam. Sementara cinta sudah terbiasa merawat luka, dan cintaku bisa merawat kita. Jika cinta adalah sebuah usaha, biar cinta merdeka dan menjadikan semuanya baik-baik saja. Cinta sudah terbukti sejak dulu merawat luka. jangan risau , aku disini. Sebab aku hanya perlu mecintaimu. Dan aku sudah berada disitu. Jadi sebarkan cinta ini kepada orang-orang yang merasa tersakiti sayang.
Happy New Year ! Little did we know (talking to my past-self) we will be safe and sound in 2021. I didn't talk much about 2020 (yet) but here we go i finally made another video for my youtube channel. This was totally unplanned. What an impromptu day that yesterday morning i just tried record some broll as a practice and because i had kitchen for myself. Later when i enjoyed my meal and watching 1 episeode of friends, the idea just popped out. I've been having this meal for breakfast for almost a month and i didn't spend too much for that so maybe that could be a content. So here it is ! I made the video in a day. without script and simple editing. And it's also surprising because it just took 1.5 hours to be uploaded on youtube. Hope You Enjoy ! XOXO Wita Koto Sudah Sudahi semua bicara Kuingin segera berdua Dan pergi menjelang melahirkan mentari Pagi dan sudah Sudahi semua prasangka Dunia berputalah saja Rekam peristiwa yang takkan terulangi Pagi dan sudah Sudahi malam yang duka Dunia kau kan baik saja Hujan akan tiba melahirkan pelangi Belajar memahami masa depan Tak kah yang disimpan akan tenang Melahirkan semua nada indah Mencoba menjadi bahagiamu sendiri Sudah lupakan semua... Sudah - Story of Kale Oleh Ardhito Pramono 2020 is the year when i'm turning 27 years old. The year (when i was much younger) was expecting myself to be married with 2 children and running my own business already. So, It's funny how it turns out so different from what i've imagined. Single with 2 cats, living abroad in Turkey without knowing when will i be ready to come back. I still work part time. Working my ass off for everything i can do to make my ends meet.
By the time i'm writing this, It's Dec 17th 2020 already. 2 weeks left before 2020 ends . Looking back this year when my school problems appeared by the beginning of the year, then pandemic hits really hard until now. So many thing happened and we don't have any control for that. I'm frustrated as so many people are but still keep trying my head up to see every good things in life and be grateful. I can't say my 27 years old is the best year but i have nothing to complain about. I'm grateful for every opportunities given every day. I won't stop learning and do something everyday. I will be as positive as i used to be 7 years ago when i worked really hard to reach my dream. And i will be again this year insya allah. Btw, thank you for coming to my blog. This blog is nothing but my personal space where i write my thoughts but too shy to share them on my instagram. Here i am writing them here expecting no one will read. So if you happened to have a visit and read thia, i want to say thank you ! please mention me on your prayer. Wish me i will always be strong and have a good life no matter how hard my life may hits me. XOXO, Wita Koto
I can't sleep and feel a little bit depressed. I regret my life. I keep looking up to people. I feel my life is such a failure. I feel lonely and hopeless. I know it's not too late yet to move on but still i feel like carrying huge weight behind that make me hard to move forward. I wanna cut off all communication with people so they won't ask what have i been up to lately. Because i can't answer that.
I wanna talk about this to somebody. To my love ones. But knowing people have their own struggle, I try harder to keep this to myself. I know the answer. I know what they're gonna say. And i don't wanna bother them no more. I don't feel like meeting them anytime sooner. I want to be supportive but i feel my absence is way to lease their weight over me. I keep saying that i need to help my own self and stop bother them. I've been trying to have less expectation on people for being able to simply motivate me so i can help myself. So i'm alone and i should really help my self now. I know i should stop complaining. And avoiding people is my way to let people think that i'm okay. Wish they won't know what i'm going through while i am passing this. This is what feel tonight. I can't deny that i am suffering this kind of feeling for these past 5 years. |
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November 2021
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