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04:07 am : Belum tidur ya? 04:08 am : Udah Bangun Tidur cepet tadi 04:08 am : DP maksudnya apa itu? 04:09 am : itu puisinya Aan Mansyur 04:09 am : ohh... Asa rancu yg kk serap mah 04:13 am : Haha ya jelaslah Mungkin tidak merasakan makanya rancu 04:13 am : Tapi agak tidak setuju dengan puisi ini 04: 14 : İya... orang boleh setuju boleh gakkan seni gak ada benar salah, semua tergantung selera 04:15 am : iya *** kemudian hening **** It was just a normal holiday on weekdays. Make myself busy doing my to-do-list that i've managed night before. I don't remember which day was it but i was going to dikimevi to submite some of my friend's documents for her university registration. The afternoon weather in dikimevi was so nice, It was always nice as long as i could remember. The sense of the wind and fountain spread the smell of wet grasses right next to pavement that i was walking in just discounted all the stressfull trafic and noisy car horns in the other side. Yes, that evening i've decided to walk for almost 3km all the way from dikimevi to kızılay. Alone. Walking for that long has made me sleep earlier that night. Made me come to the conclusion that i need to make myself exhausted so i can get rid of this insomnia that has been occured for almost 4 months. Yet, whenever i start to sleep, i always automatically wake up at the first 5 hour (I think others do this also) and then i'll continue either to sleep or not after checking up the time. But i decided to keep awake as i feel i got my period that night. My watch on my phone showed me 02:00 am. I wasn't feeling like sleeping anymore so i ended up by scrolling down my İnstagram's timeline and reading book until that massage buzzed my phone. It was really short and somehow weird conversation that i've ever had in the early morning. Questioning the reason what is necessary for him to criticize someone's feeling on that poem. And then suddenly i feel like he offended me also from the way he disagree with the things that i've given my empathy for. I know it seems like too much if i get pissed off for this little things but somehow everything about feelings are so sensitive. We can't always be "me-orientation" like thinking that's okay to say this and that because we have the right to say our opinion but we need to see something deeper before judging, try to understand the reasons so something could happen. As i was trying to understand why does he disagree, maybe he's the unpeeled fruit, the mirror that easily broken as it's said. That's why there are reasons i haven't trusted him yet to handle me. Because I'm a peeled fruit.
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